TABT Tips: Working from Home

Here are a few tips I’ve thought of lately. Please keep in mind that everyone’s situation is different and some of these may not apply to you. As always, reach out if you have specific questions or if you want to share something that has worked for your family.

• Grace. Grace for yourself. For your partner. For your child(ren). For your coworkers. For your clients. For yourself…did I say that already? This is not a normal situation. Work will not be the same. Parenting will not be the same. Everyone is doing the best they can. I think we can all agree on that.

• Get organized. Make a list of things that can get done while your child is sleeping – either early morning, during nap, or after bedtime.

• Talk to your kids about how different this is as often as possible. It’s not enough to address it the first day or once a week. Talk about it multiple times a day, every day.

  • “It sure is different that we are all home right now. It’s hard to be home together and not get to play all the time like on weekends. We need to get some work done. It’s different and feels hard. We can do it!”

• If you and your spouse are both working from home, tag team. Break up the awake hours and take shifts or organize around important phone calls or deadlines. This is a time for teamwork, not for a battle of “who’s job is more important.”

  • Be very clear to your kids that one parent is working and one parent is in charge.

  • The parent who is off to work should tell the kids goodbye - “Bye bye, Mommy’s going to work. I’ll see you soon. Daddy is in charge right now.”

  • Then, switch and say something similar – “Mommy’s home from work. Now it’s Daddy’s turn to go to work.”

  • “Mommy is working right now. I can help you until she’s all done.”

  • Firm, clear boundaries.

• Use screen time strategically. Too much screen time can affect your child’s behavior and cause the screens to lose their appeal. Use it sparingly so it’s exciting and engaging when you really need it.

• For toddlers and babies, use a play pen or baby gates for their safety and your sanity.

• For bigger kids (maybe 4+), make a “check in pass” that they can use once during brief stretches of work (this will not work for the whole day!).

  • Set them up with a snack, drink, game or activity, be sure they’ve gone to the restroom, and tell them the rules.

  • “I need to send some emails for work, your job is to play (or watch a show, etc). You have everything you need. If you really need me, you can use your pass ONE time. I’ll be back in 30 minutes to check on you.” Shorter check in time for younger kiddos.

• If your child checks in frequently, reverse it and check on them before they can. Start with small increments of time (maybe 5 minutes or so) and go in to check on them.

  • As they get used to you checking and feel sure that you’ll be back, you can slowly increase the amount of time between check ins.

  • “I’ll be back to check on you in 5 minutes. I can’t wait to see what you’ve built by then.”

• Spend one on one time with your kids before intervals of work time. Check in and play 3x a day for 10 minutes (or so) to fill them up with positive attention. This should decrease their negative attention seeking and encourage more independent play.

  • It’s also important to connect and be present with them to ease stress and anxiety.

  • Put your phone away and be 100% focused on your child.

  • When the time is up, assure them that you will play again soon. “Our playtime is up for now. I need to go get some work done. We WILL play again soon. What would you like to do while I work - play in centers or watch a show?” (or other appropriate choices).

• A SIMPLE visual schedule can really help. Include meals and snacks, work and play time, nap/quiet time, one on one play time.

• Set up some centers. Keep it simple – a bin of legos, an art table (crayons and stickers), and a basket of books (or anything your child is interested in).

  • You can set a timer for your child to rotate or leave them to play as long as they like at each station.

  • If siblings need to be separated, centers can help. Set out 3 centers and have them rotate every 10 minutes or so.

• Embrace the mess. Dishes will pile up. Toys will be everywhere. Something will break. And it will all be ok.

We are all in this together. Please reach out for support if you need it! ❤️