Say This, Not That: "Be Quiet" or "Inside Voice"

Anybody else have an extremely loud child?? Just me? 😆

Max gets super loud sometimes. He’s very enthusiastic, so it’s usually out of excitement or happiness. Which is great! But, sometimes being so loud is a little much or it’s not the right time or place. 

Last night, he was yelling as we were getting ready for bed, so I tried out an old playgroup strategy to help bring his volume down. 

I yelled, “Whoa! Your voice IS AT A 10!” Then I added quietly, “Bring it down to a 3. Like this. Can you make your voice soft like mine?” Bingo! He was able to do it. Max is 2.5.

Instead of saying “be quiet” or “use your inside voice” try using the number scale to give your kids some more specific guidance. This is discipline. We need to teach them with clear, direct instructions. As you start to use this strategy and while your kids are little, modeling is key. Use the volume you want them to use and label it from 1 - 10. 1️⃣ being a whisper and 🔟 being a yell. As your kids get the hang of it, you can simply use the numbers - “that was an 8, bring it to a 5. I can hear you at a 5.” 

This will also work in reverse if your kiddo is soft spoken.

In any discipline situation, your demeanor is important. If you come at them sternly or angrily, it won’t work. They will get defensive and resist. If you remain calm and use a a firm, but gentle tone, they are more likely to hear you and comply. Reach out if you need more help with this! 💙💚❤️💛